Disclaimer: Amy, Angel, Buffy, Cordelia, Giles, Joyce, Oz, Xander and Willow all belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. No copyright infringement intended.


Cordelia

Cordelia: What ever is causing the Joan Collins 'tude, deal with it, embrace the pain, smack your inner moppet, whatever, but get over it.

Cordelia: I don't mean to interrupt your downward mobility, but I just wanted to tell you that you won't be meeting couch Foster… the woman with the chest hair, because gym was
cancelled due to the extremely dead guy in the locker.

Cordelia: I don't think anybody should have to do anything educational in school if they don't want to.

Cordelia: Don't you have an elsewhere to be?

Cordelia: I just… hate you guys.

Cordelia: What's her deal?

Cordelia: If we die in here I'm gonna kick your ass, I mean it.

Cordelia: Hahahahahahahaha, huhh.

Cordelia: If you wanna fit in here, the first rule is, know your losers, once you can identify them all by sight, there a lot easier to avoid.

Cordelia: This isn't right, school on a Saturday, it throws off my internal clock.

Cordelia: There is a beautiful big, full moon outside tonight, it doesn't get more romantic than this, so shut up!

Cordelia: Xander? Oh my god Xander. Its me Cordelia, I know you can't answer me, but, god this is all my fault. You joined the swim team to impress me, you were so courageous… and you looked really hot in those speedos, and I want you to know that I still care about you, no matter what you look like, and… and we can still date, or not, I understand if you want to see other fish. I'll do everything I can to make your quality of life better, whether that means little bath toys or whatever.

Cordelia: I'm gonna be in therapy until I'm thirty.

Cordelia: GOD! What is your child hood trauma?

Cordelia: I do want I wanna do, and I wear what I wanna wear, and you know what, I'll date whoever the hell I wanna date… no matter how lame he is!

Cordelia: Oh, look its Mr. Excitement, on another life or death doughnut mission, or are you just cruising for bimbos again? Giving them lessons in lack of cool…. What? What? WHAT!?!

Cordelia: This is what happens when you go to school on Saturday.


NEXT